Qaulity of Life

[mojocatt]

Well, boffy and I went down to the hospital to see grandma. The place scares the holy bejesus out of me these days. So many rough times at this hostipal. Anyways, grandma has a heart vavle that has stopped functioning, and is in the closed position. This is reducing blood flow and causing a cascade effect on the other organs.

So I arrived to gather information on the situation and talk with the hospital staff. The hospital staff is pushing surgery hard, open heart surgery. My mother wants her to have the surgery as well. She will die somewhere between tonight and a month without the proceedure. The problem is, she does not want the surgery and I argeed with her. She is 88 years old and already quite frail, but sharp of mind. She justs wants to cash in her chips and call it a life. Open heart surgery will only bring pain and misery, with little chance of mantaining what one may call quality of life. The other factor is she could pass away on the operating table.

She just wants to be unopened, go home, get the hell out of the hospital, relax and pass away. Are you supoosed to argue the matter with a 88 year old woman? Everyone else seems to think so. When asked my opinion of the matter I simply said "she's the boss". Yup, she's the boss. She wants to go home? Then she is going home. She say she does not want surgery? Then there will be none. She says she wants you to stand on your head and sing the theme to Shaft? Well, get inverted and start singing. No back talk just do it, she is the one passing away.

I wish there was a clear cut solution, but alas there is not. So, we should respect and support her choice. The choice to die is one of the most important choices we will ever need to make.

Comments

[mavrik1033.livejournal.com]

Most people don't get the chance to make that decision for themselves. She is an 88 year old Woman who has a sound mind and her wishes should be granted and respected. Sure the Doctors want to help her but they also want another open heart surgery on the tote board and they all have boats to pay for.I hope in her time left here she is pain free and comfortable as possible.

What ever happened to dignity?

[(Anonymous)]

At some point in recent history it became imortant to live as long as pig-friggin possible, regardless of the condition. Hooked to a vetilator, on your back unconcious? Who cares, we'll keep you alive! Why? Because we can! I think Mav has part of it, the money/prestige part. I mean everything is about money these days right? Pizza places are graded on number of deliveries, factories are rated on productivity, I'm sure hospitals are rated on a qty/$$ basis as well. If grandma had no insurance or medic-aid, they sure as hell wouldn't be pushing for surgery! But also I think that a bizarre clinging to life mentality has crept across our nation. It is my understanding (and I know if I am wrong every asshat in lj land will be happy to correct me) that in all native american cultures the elderly were revered for their knowlege and wisdom. They were also part of the family group until the very last minute, not shuffled off into a home to be kept alive, merely to keep breathing. And most importantly, when the elder felt it was his/her time, they would wander into the woods to die with privacy and dignity. that is of course if mother nature did not take them while they were sleeping. What is wrong with wanting to die with dignity? I applaud your Grandma, and I hope the family shuts their pie hole and puts on their hat of respect. Best wishes to you and yours!
~CD

Re: What ever happened to dignity?

[mojocatt.livejournal.com]

They kept ranting on and on about the technology they had availible.

It is not a question of technology.

[drunkencricket.livejournal.com]

I agree with your, mav's and cd's thoughts on the matter.