(no subject)

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Oil prices pushed higher Tuesday as Hurricane Gustav threatened the oil infrastructure in the Gulf of Mexico, but gains were tempered by a stronger U.S. dollar.

I've really given up on these reasons for oil prices. The story could just as well read…

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Oil prices pushed higher Tuesday when Tippy the Hamster in a New Jersey Petco farted twice. Oil prices dropped when Mr. George Hitler flushed a Taco Bell Chalupa Supreme down his toilet, clogging it.

I'd be down with it.

You make a taco, that George Hitler can't flush down his toilet! What, is the taco French? God Damn unflushable frog tacos, they're destroying America!

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Although.....

I'm no meteorologist, but a storm track into the center of the gulf is never good news.