Lost

I find myself a bit lost in my own office. Its been twelve days since I went on vacation. I sat and looked at my desk for a good time, wondering just what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? Some tasks slid my way and I managed to jump right into it again.

Tasks now complete, got some Mp3's playing, coffee on my desk, donuts consumed. Time to start looking at 2004, resetting priorities, some new personal goals.

No one fucked with my shit while I was gone. Past vacations I have returned to find unexpected new office mates, reorganization, loss of office mates (taking things of mine with them), new job descriptions and general assclownery in my absence. People taking advantage of my absence to do things that I would have not approved of, such as repainting my office white, dispite my objections. Or taking all my three ring binders that I planned to use. Meetings about everything I fucked up last year, so they can jump my shit first thing upon my return.

Basicly the things they are afraid to come face to face with me about. Taking advantage of my vacation, thus making vacation almost sucky.

Everything is as I left it, no nasty surprises, a plesant treat for me. I was able to take my vacation with some now well founded trust in my co-workers.

Pleasant news in the inbox from conandammit. 2004 is off to a good start. A couple of weeks ago I was looking at 2004 like it was a piss soaked cardboard box. Maybe it will be a good year, there have been so many fucked up, sucky, ugly, painfull (did I say fucked up? let me say it again) fucked up years behind me. I have some hope it can be an alright year, a election result that ejects Dubya from the White Houe would be the iceing on the cake. Maybe a small asteriod will fall on Senators Norm Coleman and Orin Hatch, then things would get much better.

mojocatt's new year resolutions:
Fuck like a rabbit.
Drink more beer in 2004 than 2003.
Smash bugs.
Fix up house.
Grow tomatoes.
Convince boffy she really is bi-sexual and needs to bring women home to share with me.
Chase more squirrels while naked and screaming.
Punch more people who deserve punching.
Cancel cable TV.
Invade Poland.
Make a pact with the devil.
Make smootchy with notbatman at all availible moments.
Shove sidewalk chalk in more asses.
Resurect Robert Johnson.
Elect Henry Rollins President.
Stare at the wall more often.
Grow breasts.
Watch corprate America burn.
Close my eyes and wish reality TV would go away.
Spend more time wearing a kilt.

(no subject)

The busts they look just like the hey kool-aid commercial.

Breakin down the walls and they're tippin over tables and it tastes great.

The Last Hours of My Vacation

Yesterday Night, Sunday January 11, 2004

8:30PM
Put Rowan to bed. Decided since I need to go to bed early I will take some prescription sleep meds and a glass of wine. Give boffy a kiss good night, she is turning in early

8:45PM:
Meds ingested, pour glass of wine and sit down for some Master of Orion 3, as space emperor Mojocatt. Need to kick the ass of a pesky race that keeps fucking with my outer colonies. Waiting for meds to kick in, sip wine.

9:30PM:
Wine finished, pesky race much stronger than once thought, upgrade to total war after the loss of a naval task force, meds kicking in.

9:50PM
Sick of pesky race, launch entire armada and bombard 3 of their planets to dust, killing 17 billion. Galactic senate condems mojocatt, I tell them to kiss my ass, nobody does anything about it.

10:00PM
Save game. Go to catch 10:00PM news and weather. Very very druged and tired.

10:20PM
Watched weather and news, turned off TV before sports, because who really cares about sports? Go upstairs, going to take hot bath to get myself even more ready to sleep.

10:22PM
Discover toliet is plugged, begin to use plunger to unplug toliet.

10:35PM
Unsuccessful toliet de-plugging. Give up and take bath, hoping that letting the clog sit for a little while will help it.

11:00PM
Finish bath, very, very, very tired. Start working on unplugging toliet again, buck naked.

11:30PM
Toliet still plugged. Decide to give it another rest. Put on wife's robe, light blue with white flowers. Go down to play some more Master of Orion 3. Grab dopplebock beer.

11:45:
Another Beer

Monday, January 12, 2004 12:00AM
Another Beer

12:15AM
Finish beer, go back upstairs. Drugged and drunk. Begin using plunger on toliet again. Remove some water with small bucket, refill with hot water, continue to plunge.

12:45AM
Still plugged. Take break, return to MOO3, commit genocide on pesky race just because I was pissed off. An entire race of electronic beings wiped out forever because of a plugged toliet. Expelled from galactic senate.

1:00AM
Resume plunging toliet. Hands red and raw from plunging.

1:15PM
Begin violent plunging. Complete disregaurd for everything else.

1:25AM
Clog releases, toliet flushes.

1:30AM
Go to bed, 3 hours later than planned. Pissed off, but genocide makes me feel a little better. Now wide awake and grumpy.

2:00-3:00
Fall asleep?

7:00AM
Get up for work.